Breaking: Your Stats on Medium are About to Take Off 🚀

Chat GPRs robots are coming for the help

Leonardo Del Toro
3 min readMay 23, 2023
Imaginary representation of a chat GPRobots

Folks, you read my breaking news article “I finally figured out what is happening to Medium” about the secret meeting at Medium headquarters; you cannot miss this new leak involving a groundbreaking story inside the platform.

The second part of the meeting, which was unavailable until now due to technical problems with the recordings, has finally been digitally restored, and it is filled with surprisingly good news. Believe it or not.

Up to this point, there has been a lot of talk, speculation, and even fear of chat GPT taking your job, and of course, they will, but there is nothing to worry about because your stats are about to take off anyways. Enjoy this moment before they change their minds.

Medium is about to inject a battalion of chat GPRs into its bloodstream, and these invisible code robots will read your articles! Like magic, this fantastic, intelligent code will read, clap, and respond to our hard labor of writing. And here’s what they can also do.

These little reading robots are so intelligent they have specific personalities like people. They are programmed to like some things and dislike others. So, don’t expect everything you write to be read. Being rejected by humans is tough, but rejection from bots is worse. I’m just warning you.

They can also create accounts for themselves, and with their AI intelligence, they can generate AI avatars with faces of who they think they are. And they can also write articles. You might have already read some articles from these wonderful chat GPRobots. That’s the nickname some are giving them.

In my interviews of this new implementation, I spoke with Lupita Thomson from San Diego California, who wishes to remain anonymous. “My stats have improved ten fold since the introduction of the cute bots. I can write whatever I want and have thousands of reads and comments”

So, there you go. Life is great, and the future is not as gloomy as many are saying. You’ll not know the difference, and there is an advantage. Your articles will have thousands and, if not millions of hits, you’ll be unable to keep up with the responses, and soon you’ll forget about them. And claps. You’ll have so many claps you’ll get tired of it. After all, all we want are claps and responses. Everybody wins.

Unfortunately, there is only one drawback. Becasue the chat GPRs are not real people, they don’t generate income. They simply don’t need money. And for that reason, they cannot pay the $ 5-a-month membership at Medium. That, in turn, makes Medium unable to pay for articles read by chat GPRobots because they are not prime members. So, no money from that.

There you go, folks; Medium is delivering on its promises to make everyone happy. Write your article and write what you what; there will always be a chat GPRobot that will read your text. Better yet, if you activate the special function, you can befriend a GPRobot, and he will suggest improving your writing. What else do you want? Start writing and stop complaining.

Subscribe to Medium for only $5 bucks a month! Get access to all articles and plus. Write and publish on Medium and earn a few bucks!

Photo by Alex Knight